On Ultimatums In Relationships

Don’t fucking do it.

That should be the only advice you need, but since some people don’t understand, let me explain why you do not ever put out an ultimatum to a man in a relationship.

1. If you give a man an ultimatum you are standing against his pride. This is a rookie move and should be avoided at all costs. If you want a man to change his behavior then simply ask him. Putting out an ultimatum is likely to make him inclined to disagree with you simply because you are directly challenging his pride (and thus, his self-respect).
2. If you put it out there, you better be ready to pull the trigger. If you threaten to end the relationship then, in a man’s mind, the relationship is pretty much over. He knows that you are willing to torch the whole thing and he might just call you on it and see if you will. Either way, his investment in the relationship will plummet to nothing.
3. If you put out the ultimatum, he knows that he cant capitulate to it. If a man gives in to an ultimatum about anything, then the woman knows “this is the tool I have to use whenever I want about anything. This is what he is afraid to lose.” Giving into an ultimatum is like giving into a blackmailer (which is appropriate, because ultimatums are emotional blackmail) — the blackmailer won’t ever stop, they will just ask for greater and greater concessions because they know you will pay it since you paid it before.

So, again, do not give men ultimatums. There are easier and less messy ways to end a relationship with a man.